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Limiting Dreams??

Its been more than 8 months in KPMG and life is going good .. lots to learn .. lots to do ... lots of people to meet. But I feel trapped . . . . life is suddenly so structured!
No ideas, no struggles to achieve them, no milestones (except those planned in a structured goal setting exercise) ... life's good but it is unlike the heady days of being a self-motivated individual when there was a constant thought of creating something new, changing things around, doing something unique.
Life has suddenly become very planned - your manager would set targets for you to achieve, and project after another would flow in. No more brainstorming for setting your own standards, and strategizing to achieve them, no more discussions for coming up with that unique offering that would lure your audience, no more nightouts just talking about that one-idea only to reject the one you discussed last night. No more MastishK, no more Arbit, no more Khoj, no more Entreplayer, no more Ethics Portal, no more ........
I have been into my enterprising mode since school days. I reckon today the games periods spent under trees discussing - the changes in the school magazine, the new format to energize the generally morose 'morning prayer service', the new way of presenting thought for the day, the numerous revisions of singing a particular line of that song for teacher's day, and refining dialogues for that play written by the cast. Campion School has large playfields - I today feel that the abundance physical space had a psychological effect of making our ideas boundaryless and full of life.
I ask myself if I am changing for good or is this just a phase that will pass; am I entering the planned way of life or is this just a learning experience? I ask myself whether I am betraying my childhood dreams, or is this just a preparatory phase for something bigger? I wonder, whether I have been lucky all these days or is it my hard work that has borne fruit? Is this just an eclipse or the settling of twilight on the sunny days of childhood, adolescence and youth. Is life slowly going to cocoon itself in the cycle of monthly paychecks, yearly bonuses and weekend parties; or is it going to blossom into a life of greater professional clarity, greater understanding, and thus pave way for even more enterprizing efforts ??
I wonder ... nowadays .. I wonder .. may be I am mad, may be I am still trapped in my childhood. May be that Dreams are only the past-time of children and the grown ups must think practically... may be I am wrong ... may be ... I wonder .. and yet I still dream.. unable to limit my vision to what my naked eyes can see, I dream .... I dream ..... Dream Unlimited ......

1 Comments to " Limiting Dreams?? "

  1. baba...
    dreams are a realization that we are living for a purpose... and we need to work towards it...

    think of dreams as goals... and what you are doing today is a path to it... whatever you are doing today... will someday be returned in favour... so don't worry... rather... do your best at the moment of the things... cross roads will apear at every turn of the life... and you can take the dream run when ever you think you're ready to plunge in!
    ... good luck...

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